Over the last few days, I have been hesitant, tentative and wary; ducking sudden questions and beating a hasty retreat if I spy any Indian in the vicinity. There is a hunted look on my face and I have developed a tendency to jump nervously when spoken to.

Most of you are probably brimming with the vitality of youth and blessed with the ability to absorb technology like a sponge; so, you may not readily understand. But I’m a man who is well… shall I say, of somewhat er … mature vintage. Anything that is connected with technology is a source of tension. It could relate to a gadget or it could be one of those global debates about technology matters. In either case, my immediate impulse is to bury a hole and stay there until the issue has resolved itself. I don’t know which part of the brain relates to tech but, whichever it is, it has never worked for me.

For two weeks now, there has been this huge ‘net neutrality’ issue taking India by storm. From Mark Zuckerberg to my neighbour’s maid, everyone seems to have strong views on it. They have been arguing for or against, rushing around signing petitions and exhorting others to do it, posting fiery updates on Facebook and urging the government to get cracking. Having made a half-hearted attempt to figure out what exactly this is, I have failed.

I think I’ll just lie low for some time and catch up on my reading.

PG Bhaskar is a private banker and Khaleej Times’ Friday humour columnist. He has authored several books and tries hard to keep up with the times @bhaskarpg and www.pgbhaskar.com

Featured Image Artwork by Bhoomika Ghaghada